Feeling Lucky?

As a regular reader, you'll know the writing process – as I experience it – tends to be rather serendipitous. If I hang around at the keyboard long enough, something tends to turn up. This evening, feeling rather frazzled from the first day on a new project, inspiration appeared to be in short supply. Still, using my tried and true technique, I hung around for a bit and exactly what I needed dropped in my lap.

First to arrive was this quote, from Roald Dahl, which I was mentally ear-marking for another day – “Above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you, because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it.”

Hmm … I knew this post was going to end up being something around intuition and the need to stay awake for new opportunities, but here was the first concrete evidence that would be the way it would go, apart from my own current experience. What I’m working on right now came through a conversation, rather than actively seeking it through the normal channels. It came from staying open to possibility. That I chose to pursue it further came from an inner knowing that this was somehow right for me, even if it didn’t tick all the boxes on the surface.

Before this happened, I found myself dwelling on a Sufi meditation from my training as a spiritual counsellor – one where you acknowledge the past, feel yourself grounded in the present and feel the pull of the future. I had asked for the pull of the future to make itself known and Voila!, it did. Some ancient magic in that practice, I think.

So, back to tonight. I was mulling over what to write, when I came across some research on making your own luck. Only a few days ago I’d read a charming story of a couple who’d dated in their teens, both relocated to the States and found each other again when the guy suddenly emailed out of the blue after 13 years. They re-connected instantly and are now engaged to be married. What’s fascinating about the story is that the woman had left a relationship she described as having “broken down to a level of unworkable disrespect” and decided to live a happy single life rather than be lonely in a relationship. Her fiancé-to-be had gone through a ‘life’s too short’ moment when his father had a cancer scare and decided to grasp the nettle on a connection he’d long felt was ‘the one’, despite years of no contact. Both had made choices affirming what they wanted from life and now they were reaping the benefits.

Then the luck research recounted a similarly charming tale of a couple who’d met in the dry cleaners because the woman was chatty and flirty, because she’d just secured a hard-won tenure and now decided it was time to live life rather than work. So, in case you aren’t already sensing a theme, it’s time to get with the programme by following hunches and anticipating that good things will be coming your way. Here’s the science bit, so concentrate …

Richard Wiseman PhD – who holds Britain’s only professorship in the public understanding of psychology – says “Luck is not a magical ability or a gift from the gods … Instead, it is a way of thinking and behaving”. He devised an experiment where two individuals – one who perceived himself as lucky and another with a self-perception of lucklessness – were invited to the same place on the same premise, with a number of staged ‘chance encounters’ to see if their experiences would tally. One of the possibilities was finding a £5 note left on the pavement and another was meeting a ‘millionaire’ contact. Unsurprisingly, the ‘lucky’ guy hit the jackpot by spotting the money and randomly talking to the faux millionaire, while the other walked straight past the money and talked to no-one. As Wiseman puts it, “Same opportunities. Different lives.”

He says “Lucky people create, notice and act upon the chance opportunities in their lives … Being in the right place at the right time is actually all about being in the right state of mind.” Wiseman believes that putting yourself out there – even in the most minor way – can exponentially increase the connections (and potential chance opportunities) available to you. If you meet even one new person, he notes – as the average person typically knows around 300 people by name – that you’re “only two handshakes away from 300 times 300 people, so that’s 90,000 new possibilities for a new opportunity, just by saying hello”. Those are some fabulous stats. Just one ‘hello’ could utterly change your life …

This week expect good things in your life and act accordingly. If you get a hunch, don’t ignore it – act on it. Smile at someone you don’t know. Engage a stranger in conversation. Anticipate a pleasant surprise and keep your eyes open for it. This could be your lucky day.

Click through to the Coach Fabulous advice column archive by going to http://coachfabulous.blogspot.com/. For alert emails on new postings, email subscribe@iamfabulous.co.uk. The I Am Fabulous archives can now be found at http://fabcentral.blogspot.com/. All material ©2009 Alison Porter. No article may be reproduced in full or in part without the express permission of the author.